Friday, December 3, 2010

What I stole from Santa…

by Clarissa Yip

Congratulations to the following winners of Clarissa's blog:

Chelle - chellesandell@sbcglobal.net . Amazon $20 dollars

Joder - joderjo402 AT gmail DOT com for Snowy Encounters


Dear Santa,

By the time you are reading this letter, you will notice that your naughty/nice list is missing. Who is the culprit?

Me!

Bah Humbug! You’re a big fat meanie! So, I decided to help you out a bit.

Why? you ask.

1. I’m freezing my tush off in New York and my muse left me for warmer weather. No more exotic lagoons, clear blue skies, and palm trees in Hawaii for me. Instead, you give me cold weather, pretty snowfalls, AND I have to give up my sandals for UGGS. (A new pair of UGGS would be nice, preferably gray or dark brown. Here’s the link: UGGS

2. I’m gaining weight. Thanksgiving, I had to eat four turkey dinners and now with you coming into town, my sister is baking me all these yummy goodies. Cupcakes! I’m actually fed real food instead of the usual cup of coffee for breakfast, a walk to the empty fridge for lunch, and a quick run to the drive-thru for dinner. I have normal meals with my family. I get food coma so often, I can’t seem to write. How am I going to get through this? (A new gym membership would be nice. Preferably Gold’s Gym. I like their marble countertops.)

3. I wrote an anthology with my Passionate Critters (my critique partners), called A Passionate Christmas Series, and Decadent Publishing had to put up with all of us monsters, but I bet no one told you how many times I wanted to pull out my hair and call it quits. Instead, they kept encouraging me to finish and now I have a new release, called Snowy Encounters. If I hadn’t finished, then Cole and Maddy along with Five Oaks wouldn’t have existed, and the letter ‘A’ and ‘delete’ on my keyboard wouldn’t be so faded. (A new computer would be nice. The Macbook Air would fit perfectly in my purse.)

4. My editor praised me and said she liked Snowy Encounters. I had to enlarge the document to make sure I wasn’t seeing things when I got my edits. I thought she must have lost her highlighter, but no torture session this time. Christmas came early. Run! Now I have to keep an extra eye on her and question what I am doing right in my writing. ( A pair of night vision goggles would be nice. I think you can find those at any sporting goods store.)

Now, you’re probably weighing the amount of coal to put in my stocking, but let me tell you one last thing. If I hadn’t written you this letter, then you wouldn’t have known where your list had gone to. It’s in Five Oaks. You have no choice but to go there now to claim it and see the wonderful town I had built with my awesome anthology minions. I hope you don’t cross Five Oaks off your map just yet. My hero, Cole Harmon, thanks you for working with Old Man Winter to help him rebuild the town and bring his spunky wife, Maddy, home to him. I’m sure you’re curious as to see what has happened to them, since I had stolen your magical orby thing, and now you can’t see anything, so you and Mrs. Clause will just have to come and find out for yourself. You only have twenty-two days left before Christmas, so you better hurry!

P.S. In case you haven’t figured it out, you won’t get your list back, until I get the things I’ve asked for.

P.P.S. One more thing, if you’ve really decided on the coal for my stocking, then I have no choice but to read you a bedtime story from Snowy Encounters. Look for me on December 17th, along with my other fabulous Decadent Authors.


Just to make up for my bad behavior, I will give away two copies of Snowy Encounters and a $20 Amazon Gift Card to anyone willing to aid in getting Santa to Five Oaks. If you don’t find me here, than look for me over at http://decadentpublishing.blogspot.com/ . I’m causing mischief over there, too.

**To Celebrate our '8 Crazy Nights', Decadent Publishing will also be giving the winner one FREE book of their choice from Decadent Publishing**

Sincerely,

Clarissa Yip

Find Clarissa:

http://clarissayip.com/

Twitter

Facebook

79 comments:

  1. I would love to help Santa get to Five Oaks, I might want to stay there myself.I hope you get at least a few things off your list. Happy Holidays.

    seriousreader at live dot com

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  2. Wellllll...I'll help only if Santa stops off in Santa Cruz first and leaves me a new Ipod... ;-)

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  3. Thanks ladies! I hope I get UGGS too! And he better fulfill that list if he wants his stuff back!

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  4. Ill help him get there because see I know this lil sinnerhas been extra good this year so ineedhim to see his lists o he knows so i can get extra naughty stuff since i was so nice and all

    I hope you get ur wish list too and congrats on ur newbook

    mortalsinn@yahoo.com

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  5. Thanks SiNn for stopping by! I hope you get everything you wished for too!

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  6. Clarrissa, you are too funny. Loved your post. I could give Santa directions to Five Oaks, but just for you I'll let him sweat a little.

    I figure I must be bad, Santa skips me most years. (lol) So if you keep the list maybe he'll surprise me this year. *crossing fingers*

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  7. LOL. Oh Rachel, I'm sure he'll be nice if he does want I want. Hope you do get something good for christmas!

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  8. How could Santa resist Five Oaks?
    And I'll definitely be dropping in on the 17th - can't wait!

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  9. Oh, Santa Baby...
    I can't yell at him. My hubby got me a kindle and gave it to me on T-day. Now I just have to figure out how to get books for it... The free reads are ok, but not what's on my TBR list, LOL.

    I do think you managed to tempt him nicely inthe post! Very cute. And Five Oaks works even better!

    vickykerr[at]sbcglobal.net

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  10. Umm...hello? Santa is a *man*! He can't find anything. He better take Mrs. Claus with him to Five Oaks. :-)

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  11. Gina is definitely naughty. ;) You, however...well...I'm gonna chalk your behavior up to a sugar high. Lay off the carbs, Clarissa, and maybe Santa will get you your wish.

    I've spent some time in Five Oaks with the resident vet and I must say, he's definitely an angel. ;) And a hunky one, too. Best of luck and best of sales to all of you Passionate people.

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  12. Do I need to try and kidnap him and drag him to Five Oaks? I would do it for you! Wonder if I can talk the zombie twins into helping? Santa wouldn't truly punish children would he?

    I really can't wait to take a moment to read these stories! Best of luck with the book!

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  13. LOL Too funny! loved the Blog. Enjoy the cupcakes and food coma while they last. Merry Christmas!

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  14. That was so funny! Thanks. If I happen to see Santa down here, I'll make sure not to tell him you have the naughty list. ;) I want my pressies too! *g* I look forward to reading your work, Clarissa. Have a good one!

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  15. Moira - The Zombie Twins would love it in Five Oaks. There's snow, avalanches and bake sales.
    The kids get to climb all over the fire truck. :P

    Clarissa - I found out the Uggs I got aren't waterproof! Be sure to tell Santa to make sure they are real Uggs. :P

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  16. Clarissa, what a very clever blog post! I loved it, but sheesh, all of you 30 Days of Decadent bloggers have been so awesome, my blog post will pale in comparison.

    Sounds like a fun anthology and I wish you and your Passionate Critters all the best of success with it!

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  17. An elf told me Santa's gone digital last year and keeps the copy of the naughty list, but since you admittend to stealing the original he'll forgive you and you'll get all from your list and then some. And for me, ah, I don't need anything. Really, I have no use of another sweater that doesn't fit, or is not my style, color... you name it. Or whatever meaningless gift there may be.

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  18. LOL, Clarissa! You're on MY nice but naughty list, and I'd love to make sure Santa gets all your goodies to you this year ;) We'll see how well he does--I'm not asking for much--just books and more books ;) Come on, Santa! :D

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  19. Too cute! I hope Santa doesn't put coal in your stocking!

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  20. Forget Santa finding Five Oaks-I want to go there myself! The books looks fabulous. OK, OK, I'll take Santa with me so I can help save Christmas

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  21. I'm soooo glad I got my Uggs last year cause I think I'm right there with ya on that naughty list! Good luck with the power to say no to the cupcakes. :D

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  22. Sounds like if we can get to Five Oaks, we may not need sweaters and mittens to stay warm!

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  23. Poor Santa. You really shouldn't tease him, you know. Can you tell that I'm desparately trying to get back on the nice list?

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  24. Nina, no one can resist Five Oaks! I'd want to visit but I think I'm allergic to snow too! Be warned for the 17th!

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  25. Vicky! Oooooo, u have a kindle! That's awesome. I love ereaders! They're so convenient and portable. Don't know what I would do without mine. I do hope Santa stops by or....lol

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  26. Lmao! Gina! Yes, Santa is definitely a man, and he probably will forget half my list but he's not getting his stuff back if he doesn't do as I say! Lol

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  27. Hi Veronica! So you've met Ash. I definitely think he's more trouble than me! I can live without carbs either! Cupcakes are carbs, right?

    Thanks for stopping by!

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  28. I will help Santa! Especially if he's a big furry bear type man with a penchant for dominance! :)

    ~smooches~
    Jase
    vslavetopassionv(at)aol(dot)com

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  29. Hey Clarissa - if you happen to see me listed on the naughty list, could you put a little smiley face beside it so that I'll be designated as the "delightful" kind of naughty? Thanks loads!

    Maeve ;-)

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  30. Around my house it's Mrs Claus who gets herself organized and treats her darlings to special gifts. Mr Claus is kind of a bah humbugger, lol.

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  31. Bought my hubby a GPS a couple of years ago and he never uses it. We recently got lost while out of town and I dared to ask, "where's the GPS I bought you" to which he replied "at home"! Brilliant!

    So, Santa can have this GPS will that help?

    What a great post, btw.

    --Carlie
    carlieangelus@gmail.com

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  32. Love your letter to Santa. Maybe we should bribe the reindeer to head straight to Five Oaks with your Uggs.

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  33. Loved it . but santa has been so bad this year and yet ur giving him a vacation to a lovely spot. I've been bad too can I come with? lol.

    meandi09@yahoo.com

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  34. Nice (well, naughty; but nice).
    I don't need to be entered (in the contest). But I wanted to drop by and say you are sooooo getting coal inside your new UGGs.lol
    Heather

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  35. ha ha so here I am winking at Santa and hoping for an IPad (I will settle for a new kindle or nook) if he gives it to me I will just get on google maps and lead him right down to 5oaks cos am a snitch.
    That makes me nice right? am good to the jolly people.

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  36. Santa will love Five Oaks when he gets there!
    Hope you get what is on your list.

    kissinoak at frontier dot com

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  37. I'll help Santa, but it better not require any toy making abilities. I'm not that handy at making things.

    joderjo402 AT gmail DOT com

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  38. I think Santa wants us to be a bit naughty. He'd be bored if it were any other way. And I'm sure he has GPS :)

    lenikaye@yahoo.com

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  39. *tackle hug* Moira! LOL. I'm sure Santa would love the zombie twins. Afterall,I have his list. bwahhahaha

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  40. Ellen! Merry Christmas to you too! Hope you've been good lately!

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  41. Thanks, Julianne! What makes you think I don't have his nice list too...? LOL

    Thanks for stopping by!

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  42. Oh Silke, that's not good. You need the protector stuff for sheep skin. Shoot, I should have put that in the list. lol

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  43. Gracen, I'm sure your post will be wonderful! I can't wait to read it. This 30 day holiday blog is awesome. Love seeing the different perspectives on the holidays and prizes! Yay!

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  44. LMAO. Oh Firetulip, that was too funny. I totally didn't think about digital. Hmm...and all my books are digital. Shoot! I'll be better prepared next year!

    Thanks for stopping by!

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  45. Flechn1, you never know! Maybe Santa will slip you a copy of Snowy Encounters! LOL.

    Thanks for stopping by!

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  46. Dawn, I hope Santa doesn't leave me coal either, but I heard through the grapevine, my stocking is getting heavy...
    LOL


    Thanks for stopping by!

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  47. Hi Kathy! *chuckle* I hope you come to Five Oaks too! You'll be surprised to see what the town has to offer, and yes, please bring Santa. I want my stuff. LOL

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  48. Chelle! Cupcake princess! I'll have to show off the cupcakes your company makes! They're gorgeous!

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  49. Hi Teri Anne! You may be onto something. Maybe the love in town will keep everyone warm...or the mischief, or the crazy on probation angels, or the assassin witches, or the paranormal investigators. LOL Santa will find out!

    Thanks for stopping by!

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  50. LOL. I'm sure Santa won't be mad at you, Leanne. Unless...did you take something of his too?

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  51. Hi Jason! LOL. We'll have to see how dominating Santa is when he gets to town!

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

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  52. Hi Maeve, will do! I'll even put a heart next to your name, but someone told me Santa went digital so he might not show...lol

    Thanks for stopping by!

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  53. Cathy! We need to get you to Five Oaks. Can't have bah humbugger Santas! lol.

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  54. Carlie! LOL. I'm sure Santa has his own reindeer GPS but nowadays with everything being so high-tech...LOL. I'm sure your husband knows better next time. I hope you guys got home okay!

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  55. Crystal! I love that idea! As long as the reindeers don't ruin the sheepskin before I get it. LOL.

    Thanks for stopping by!

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  56. Jenn, you should definitely come to Five Oaks and play! Lots to do...okay, maybe not, but we have a great townsfolk! It'll be fun!

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  57. Heather! Evil! It's a conspiracy! Why would you want to ruin a good pair of UGGS with coal? LOL. I knew you were behind why Santa is so late....

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  58. Hi Joanna! Are you bribing Santa or blackmailing him? LOL. I do hope you get everything you asked for Christmas!

    Thanks so much for stopping by! I'll see you at the Interrogation room!

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  59. Estella, Thanks for stopping by! I hope Santa likes Five Oaks, too!

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  60. Joder, LOL. No toy making allowed. I'd probably burn his toy house down if he stuck me in there...

    Thanks for stopping by!

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  61. Oh Leni, we'll have to wait and see how high tech Santa is. LOL. We probably all are on the naughty list. ha.

    Thanks for stopping by!

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  62. Very funny post! Thanks for the laughs :-)

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  63. Aww, I'm glad I made you laugh, Sarah! Thanks for stopping by!

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  64. Oh my, UGS is such a nice idea. Black one please size 9. Since I moved to a much colder climate (hell, we have snow now) this would come real handy.
    PS I have never laugh so much while reading a letter to Santa. Guffafff!!!!!!

    CJ

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  65. Great letter to Santa. I have many of the same issues. Good luck with your endeavors.

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  66. Hi Clarissa, I hear UGGS are co comfy and you can wear themw/out socks, not me, but if they keep your toes toasty, I'm in for them. :)

    I so enjoyed your post!

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  67. CJ, I'm so glad I made you laugh. Thanks so much for stopping by! I don't have a black pair of UGGs, but i wouldn't mind having one of those too...Lol.

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  68. Thanks Debby! Thanks for stopping by!

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  69. Thanks Dina! I love UGGS especially when it's cold and just the feel of sinking my toes in the fur with a cup of hot chocolate and fire, and maybe a hot guy. LOL.

    Thanks for stopping by!

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  70. Five Oaks sounds like the perfect place to spend the holidays, but you really have been naughty, Clarissa. Shame shame. :-)

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  71. Thanks, Becca. Santa loves me, I swear!

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  72. I'm in on all the naughty and nice, as well! Happy holidays!!

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  73. Lol, that note you wrote for santa was awesome.It made me SMILE!

    Happy Holidays!

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  74. I'd be happy to loan Santa my GPS if it helps get him there. Really enjoyed your note. Happy Holidays!

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  75. Thank you all ladies, Happy holidays!

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